This is the literary weblog of Jeffrey W. Hull, M.D., a pediatrician. It is intended mainly as a place to maintain a collection of poetry created for the enjoyment of a few friends and as an archive for my family. All material is protected by US copyright.

Jeffrey Hull

Friday, December 02, 2005

Rain

At dusk, the gutter xylophone
Brings solace when one lies alone
With tink-tink-tink on twilight eaves,
The quiet tune when someone leaves.

By night the muffled shingle drums
Just patter on 'til daylight comes
Their soft percussive lullaby
That plays when someone says goodbye.

At dawn the drummer riffs some blues
Then packs it in, and kelly hues
Are more intense with final drops
And then at last the drumming stops.

The audience long lies awake
And wonders yet what small mistake
Or thoughtless word could so offend–
Then sleeps to let the sun ascend.


© 2005 Jeffrey Hull

1 Comments:

I could dissect and parse this one at length. It has a wonderfully vibrant skeleton and fine flesh and plumage, but wants some proprtional changes.

It's VERY goodm in my opinion, and for that reason I want to tweak it so very much.

But my tweaking brain is exhausted.

Without a doubt, though, the final stanza is a complete masterpiece.

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